After an hour, conversation is flowing more naturally – though, saying goodbye, my nerves return. It feels like a safe middle ground, and I’m grateful.
By the time I meet my second date, Juliana, a 36-year-old barrister I come across on Citysocializer, I feel like an old hand. I was quite nervous about meeting for a whole meal – there’s no easy get-out in the way there is for a coffee. Juliana’s reasons for joining the site are similar to mine.
I reply, gushing about how much I love the States, but then hear nothing back. Still, I persevere for a few days and by midweek, I have plans to meet three women. It feels, somehow, as though there’s more at stake than there would be with a romantic date.
Perhaps that’s why, from the moment she walks into the Italian restaurant where we’re having dinner, I’m at ease. Once she reached her thirties, peers started settling down.
She split from a long-term partner and lost friends in the process.
Think of your closest friends, how did you meet them? If you met each other pre 30’s chances are it sort of just happened.
Most likely you met at school, caught the bus together, are friends of friends, shared a flat at uni or maybe just sat opposite each other at work.
But what happens when you meet someone and think to yourself “I NEED to be friends with them” because, that’s happened to us all, you meet a person in a situation where it’s not a linear experience to go from your first ‘hi’ to a fully blown friendship.