Dating during divorce kids
You have let time pass and she has had a chance to grieve.
I hope that this man is a serious choice and not just a passing interest. This will work if your ex is mature enough to use this information productively for the sake of your child. If you ex is not sufficiently mature to handle this conversation constructively, you will have to deal with this differently.
More importantly, what you’ve created together is wonderful for your daughter.
She doesn’t have to be dragged into the middle by two parents who hate each other.
Even great divorces have their rough times, and dealing with a new love interest is often one of those moments.
I want to thank Irene Levin for inviting me to look at a common problem found in the best of divorces—one that brings up issues of displacement, divided loyalties and even jealousy.
It was a bad experience that you found out about his lover by accident. These things are better (but often not) done in collaboration.
So, in general, if an ex husband brought two women into your daughter’s life right away that’s usually destructive.
Did he really believe that each woman was going to be a stable feature of his life going forward, or was it just more convenient to hang out with his girlfriend when your daughter was with him?
Note that kids need time to grieve the loss of their nuclear family without having to deal with something new.
And, make sure that you really love this new person and that the relationship is serious.
It’s good for an ex to know about an upcoming introduction of the new friend in advance.